Friends and Frustrations – Alzheimer’s in the Family

Mom continues to have good days. Such a blessing. Last Saturday Amos, Chelsea and the boys came for a visit and brought lunch. Mom was engaged and played I spy with the boys. She was almost like her old self. She did ask the boys over and over about school but she was laughing and playing with them. It was a good visit. When she became overstimulated, she retreated into her newspaper and Amos and I completed a few chores. All the locks are now on the top of the doors for her safety.

As mentioned in the last blog, mom went to church on Sunday. She wasn’t able to go since she got the woman of the year award in July.

Tuesday mom’s sisters-in-law, Brenda, came and brought her teenage grandsons to visit. She brought a tasty cake and garden veggies. Mom has enjoyed eating them a little at a time. The visit was very good and mom also engaged with them. It was lovely to see.

Late Tuesday afternoon my cousin Charles came in from Decatur to stay several days with us. It was such a good homecoming. We got mom to bed about 11 PM and we stayed up until 1:30 AM just talking. It was good for our souls. It is great having him here with us and he engaged mom in reminiscing about bygone days. So much laughter and animation. ❤️

Wednesday mom got a her hair did, which included getting a much needed perm. Charles and I had 2 hours to run errands, etc. while mom was at the shop with Jackie. It feels amazing to have bits of time to leave the house and get things done and have just that bit of freedom. I have always lived my life the way I wanted. Out with friends, traveling, and just being able to leave the house on the spur of the moment. I will never ever take that for granted again.

Thursday was neurologist appointment day in Raleigh. We made a day of it and went to my son, Amos’s house and had lunch with the family. Mom played some ball with Silas when he came home from preschool and we had a good visit. Her appointment was at 2:30 PM across town.

The neurologist appointment was uneventful and disappointing. They did regular questions and spent about 50 minutes with us but would not do anything for her because we haven’t gotten results from the heart monitor. Mom is still losing weight so they want her GP to order gastrointestinal testing to make sure her lack of appetite isn’t something other than the Alzheimer’s. It seems we run round and round to this doctor and that doctor and no one knows much more when they leave than they knew when they came in.

We get the results of the heart monitor on Tuesday. Hopefully, something will be done about the low heart rate, but at this point, who knows. I’m supposed to call the neurologist after the appointment on Tuesday about any medication that is prescribed so they can prescribe a medication for Alzheimer’s that will not interfere with appetite and the heart meds. I feel that we are on a hamster wheel, spinning and spinning.

I guess the next decision to be made is how long we run from doctor to doctor. If there really isn’t anything to change the outcome, why am I putting my mom through all this BS? Legitimate questions. Seems to be a way to line the pockets of “health care professionals.” There is a reason why I used quotes here.

Thursday night Liz and Aunt Helen brought a delicious dinner when they came to visit. We had a good time sitting around the table and reminiscing. Reminiscing is good for mom because she does remember the distant past. The present, not so much. It was a lovely evening.

Friday was a good day. We talked, watched movies, and did some housework. Mom ate her yogurt breakfast and helped herself to a bowl of ice cream about 30 minutes before lunch time. I delayed her lunch for a couple of hours and asked her if she was hungry. She said no but she picked up a sleeve of tea cookies and started to eat them. I took them from her and told her she had to have real food as she is suffering from malnutrition from eating too little and eating junk all the time.

Mom got extremely angry…. if looks could kill and she pouted like a 4 year old. I fixed her plate and Charles said, “Aunt Joyce, that lunch is so good.” She ate the small lunch and thanked me. I do wish that feeding her was not so difficult. The doctor says I’m doing it right by offering food several times a day and by letting her have ice cream and such when I can’t get her to eat anything else. It is hard knowing how much weight she is losing and that she is in fact malnourished. There is only so much a person can do.

Mom’s best friend, Zona Mae, came for a visit on Friday night. She stayed until 11 PM and entertained us with stories about farm life. She was a hoot and we had fun staying up past mom’s bedtime. We’ll see how late mom sleeps in today. The last thing mom asked me at bedtime last night was do we have to go anywhere tomorrow? I told her no and she seemed so relieved. Hopefully today will be a quiet day of rest. We have lots to do next week, including doctor appointments and going back to my home in Myrtle Beach.

More later.